MARCH '94

I heard a guy reminisce about the night John Candy died.

Now, I knew he died,

but I can't say it had much particular meaning to me.

But the guy,

he said Candy melted

back in March '94, right before Kurt Cobain.

Right before my grandma.

And I was thinking,

'Poor John's not gonna get the cred

that Cobain did.

There were no ten-year anniversary commemorations

of his genius.'

It's like Johnny Cash,

who had the dumb fortune

to die the same day as John Ritter.

I mean, it's amazing;

who'd even have noticed?

What are the odds, anyway,

two Johns dying the same day

and no angry pimps involved,

at all?

Anyway, poor Mr. Cash,

who will no doubt be forgotten

in the wake of the genius

of Mr. Hooperman,

Mr. Stay Tuned,

Mr. Three's Company,

Mr. Eight Rules...

What kind of testimony will Johnny have

and who the hell was John Candy anyway?